Planes Trains and Automobiles

An opportunity came my way to attend an economic forum on the relationship between economics and environmentalism. It's sponsored by the Foundation for Teaching Economics (FTE) and the Hawaii Council on Economic Education (HCEE). I just so happened to get an email from a homeschooling group that clued me in to this incredible opportunity. It's free, and though I wish it was on my island, it is providing me a short respite form my usual work week. It is no small effort for mama to leave home: I put the kids on a quasi-fall break (something we normally do not do), and have actually hired someone to drive my children to and fro. (Between Tae Kwon Do, swimming, piano, drums, art class, Trig class, and PSAT prep class, there's a bit of chauffeuring in an average day.) So that brings us to my departure... DAT had kindly planned to drive home from the office to take me to the airport. However, he was awakened at 6AM by his assistant calling to tell him that in fact, the newly repaired (FedExed from Texas) computer was dead again. So, he had to book it in to assess the damage and begin a plan of recovery. Again. No worries, I can drive myself, and he'd just have to figure out how to get the vehicles back where they belong. No big deal. There was a little issue checking in, but it got resolved. As I approached my gate, I heard my name on the PA system. So I went to the desk at the gate. No one was there and it had a sign that it was closed. However, there was someone right at the jetway. I approached her and attempted three times to get her attention. I was less than five feet from her, and got progressively louder, yet she did not react in the slightest. She typed feverishly at her keyboard, then turned around, swiped her ID card and walked down the jetway. "Typical," was my thought. I walked to the next gate desk and tried to ask that person for help. Though he did acknowledge me, he seemed surprised that I expected him to assist me. He told me to go to my gate. When I told him that I had just been there and had been ignored, he said, "Well you should go back there. She'll eventually come back." So I did. And he was right. She did come back. But she did not make eye contact with me and again did not acknowledge me at all. So I figured "I've got my boarding pass, and they'll be boarding shortly. If they really need to talk to me, they'll know where to find me." Boarding began, and as I walked down the aisle of the plane, something very unusual happened. My seat was 5D on this smallish plane, but as I looked at the numbering above the seats, I saw row 1, 2, 3, 4, 6....Wait a minute. There is no row 5. So, I try to make my way back to the flight attendant who so pleasantly smiled an welcomed me aboard. By now, though, there is a steady stream of people boarding the plane. I finally get the flight attendant's attention, and explain to her my problem. Her first words to me were, "This plane doesn't have a row 5." "Yes," I said, "that's what I am asking you about." She is flustered and says, "When did you print this?" "About 15 minutes ago at a kiosk downstairs." I reply. She frowns and says, "Uh...just sit here." And motions for me to sit in the first row. So I do. (I've heard you'd better do as your told on planes these days, or you can land in the pokey.) I wait as everyone boards the plane--including the people whose seats I'm waiting in. They were very kind as I moved to another empty seat. Finally the original woman who ignored me at the gate is on the plane and is apparently here to save the day. At this point, I am not only seriously in doubt of her saving abilities, but I realize I'm probably screwed. Then the gate lady asks a man sitting in row two if the empty seat next to him has anyone in it. He says he doesn't think so (being just a passenger and all). So customer ignoring gate lady points to the seat and says to me, "Sit there." So I do. And that was that. I made it on time to check in and register for the seminar, and off I went!